I step into the light without knowing what it will show
I do not turn away
I do not explain
I do not defend myself
I see what is there
I see what I avoided
I remain present
And I do not leave
I see what I wanted to ignore
I see the places I avoided
I called it reason
I called it caution
I called it wisdom
But it was fear
I stay with what resists me
I do not escape
Not this time
It does not go away
It presses closer
Questions rise
Answers fail
Everything in me wants release
Everything in me wants noise
But I stay
Under pressure
I had my reasons
I had my ground
I was tired
I was wounded
I was alone
I did what I could
I did what worked
I did what kept me standing
But it was not life
It was survival
You missed the closeness while staying protected
You missed the voice while staying in control
You missed the healing while proving your strength
Nothing was taken
Nothing was destroyed
But much was left untouched
I know forgiveness stands before me
I know it waits without demand
But I cannot take it
Not yet
My hands are open
My chest is tight
I want to receive
But I do not know how
I let go where I held anger
I let go where I felt wronged
I let go where I was misunderstood
I let go where I was wounded
I let go where I could not forgive myself
I do not take it
I do not claim it
It comes to me because it is given
I receive what I could not earn
Not as proof
Not as reward
As grace
I do not name myself
I am named
Not for what I proved
Not for what I endured
I am called from where I stand
A new name, for a true place
Nothing needs to happen now
Nothing needs to be proven
I am not waiting
I am not leaving
I stand where I was placed
I live from what was given
I remain
Alex · Quellenbeziehungen